Controlling Spouses

CONTROLLING SPOUSES

Spouses with controlling personalities can be very hard to spot until it is too late. They tend to prey on kind hearted, compassionate people that give all they have. They also prey on those that are economically disadvantaged, previously abused and emotionally weak, as well as those with low self esteem. Allow me to clarify controlling spouses are not gender-specific. I will refer to these people as controllers. I feel like there is a myth about being nice to people. Being nice does not qualify for weakness.

Compassionate people are possibly some of the strongest people in the world. I say strongest because of the mere personal sacrifices they make for the happiness of others. I will refer to these people as givers. Too often, this characteristic is mistaken for weakness. Controllers feel they can play the needy game with compassion. They always have a need, be it physical, emotional or psychological. Controllers emotionally express their need for someone to be there at all times. Givers have an internal need to fix people. They do all they can to accomplish that. Controllers disguise there plan as concern for the givers' safety.

For those that are economically disadvantaged, controllers hold material possessions and money very dear to them. The disadvantaged person gets sucked in by the shiny things in life, and thus, are willing to do whatever it takes to keep the finer things in life around them. It doesn't seem to matter that they never have any money in their pocket. One of the major possessions that a controller wants is their spouse. The spouse ceases to be a person, only a possession. They are made to believe that without the controller, they will have nothing and they are nothing.