Advantages of Pre-Marital Counseling

Pre-marital counseling, although a private choice, seems like the logical choice. I'd warrant that any couple would benefit from pre-marital counseling.

Pre-marital counseling is a wake up call for a lot of couples. The proposal, planning the wedding, and the big "I do" are an idealized way of looking at a lifelong commitment. One of the reasons I believe so many relationships end in divorce in this country is that couples don't take time to assess the gravity of the commitment they are making to each other.

A marriage is not just a Romantic coupling. A marriage is a financial and legally binding agreement. A marriage is accepting your partner, their family, their quirks and understanding their future plans. A marriage is knowing how your partner feels about children, how money will be spent, if either of you want to travel, live in the city or country, have pets, hunt, vote Republican or Democrat, decorate, attend church, if abortion is a viable option, or what your views on traditional wifely or husbandly duties entail.

Pre-marital counseling addresses each of the above issues. Some pre-marital counseling sessions begin with a quiz you take about each other. Some couples are shocked to see what the other thinks of them or what they anticipate their future spouse would do in certain situations. By learning how you view the other, or think they would react is a wake up call. I remember my friend taking the test was shocked that her future husband got every question wrong about how she viewed certain religious and political situations. Taking the time to learn about each other, but also analyze how each of you views the other is necessary.

Another important issue pre-marital counseling addresses is having the couple discuss what they want out of the marriage. Revealing that you expect ten children when your husband doesn't want any can be a deal breaker. Springing that you'd like to relocate in five years to France with your company may make your wife think twice about marrying you. Pre-marital counseling makes you look at realities about what a marriage will mean for your life.