When I Keep in Touch with My Ex-Partner

Some people think than when a relation is over, everything is over. No friendship after breaking up a romantic liaison is possible. I personality prefer to see things from other point of view. If a romantic relationship didn't worked out, it doesn't mean that nothing will work out between two people.

After investing a lot of time into a relationship, I know a lot about someone. Breaking up is, of course, always a possibility. Some people simply don't come well along as partners, however, that doesn't mean that you will not come along well as friends.

Many of my relationships started as friendship and turned into a romantic relationship. Why can't we just 'downgrade' the relationship back to simply friendship? Of course, I prefer to live some time to move on. After breaking up, I am done with dating and done with breaking up. However, I have no question that if I like someone I want to keep friendship.

A point that I explicitly recommend is checking out if any one of you want to keep friendship with second intentions in mind. That's a terrible idea. Friendship with second thoughts is not that valuable. It is for me only a stressful and frustrating relationship. It will not be a constructive friendship. Make clear with your ex and also be realistically clear about your real intentions.

Only be friends if you think the person will be a valuable friend. Don't take the topic lightly. After breaking up you will not have to go through a getting to know again phase. And that is wonderful, if and only if you are done dating.

Another important point is to ask yourself, if you want friendship just out of habit, because it is convenient, or because you find your ex exceptional. In my life, it was rather the second case, but I found plenty of examples of the first. Don't be friends just because you are so near each other. Intimacy is only valuable with valuable people. It will not be a comfortable situation if you keep seeing each other just because you met once.