Forgiveness is the Key to Breaking Negative Influences

I have been thinking over some of my past relationships and what they meant to me. Most were just for a season, maybe even just a glimpse in time, but others shaped me.

I heard my pastor say that, "You will become what the most important person in your life believes you can be." What a statement. Read it again, and just sit with it a moment

Well, the funny thing is I had to really think who that person was and why their opinion was so important to me that I had unconsciously fulfilled some of their expectations for me. It sort of sent me on my knees thinking I disliked this person so much, and I knew the feeling was mutual, and this person had never been there for me, so how could I have so foolishly have given them so much power. It was simple she was my mom. The one who was supposed to teach me about unconditional love and acceptance had done the opposite. She was the one that made me feel worthless and unwanted, but people defended her. Because of her mistakes I suffered physically and mentally, so how could I do this to myself. She was my mom.

It is the paradox of all time. I knew she was bad for me and offered me nothing but harm, but I had been conditioned that I was bad if I did not love her or honor her. We have not been in the same room in over 25 years, but somehow the thought of her still taps the little girl that wanted the mom that gave her away.

There have been many substitutes, but none seemed to compare no matter how I felt or what I did. So I was left wondering how I could change the most important person in my life from someone who has wished me harm to someone who gave me love and support. Was there a magic word or a formula? It had to be the art of letting go. Letting go can only be accomplished through full unconditional forgiveness.