Most
parents have a strong desire to do what is right by their children. At some point though, you notice that your children’s behavior doesn’t quite match your expectations. This can be disappointing and frustrating to the parent. The
child acts defiant, refuse to do simple chores and seem unwilling to learn. Your normal disciplining techniques; grounding, time-outs, taking away privileges all seem unsuccessful. You are faced with an angry, sulking and defiant child. It is time for a behavior modification program. These modification programs allow
parents to educate their
children on what behaviors are acceptable and which behaviors are not. The
education is done through a system of rewards and consequences. Once the behaviors are established the program can be terminated. A well developed behavior modification program measures it success in the change in the child’s behavior.
Getting Started First: Identify the areas where your
child has problems. Prioritize the behaviors you wish to modify. Start the behavior modification program with only two or three behaviors you wish to modify. For example, you may wish your
child to stop
running in the house. Explain to the
child that this behavior is unacceptable and will have negative consequences. Second: Identify the areas where the
child has strengths. For example, your
child may have no problem going to bed on time. Praise the
child for this behavior and encourage her/him to keep it up. Third: Assign each behavior points. The points are the currency for the rewards i.e. 3 points for making bed, 3 points for
cleaning room, 3 points for walking in the house, and lose 3 points for
running the house. Fourth: Set up a chart large enough so that your
child can see the clear picture of how they are progressing. Let your
child help with the designing of the chart; make them feel excited about the program. This lets them understand they are in charge of the results of the program. This is the how your
child will start understanding and learning consequences. Fifth: Sit down with the
child and discuss possible rewards for point accumulation such as TV privileges, special trip to ice cream parlor, and choice of desserts. Have
fun coming up
fun rewards. The rewards should be
age appropriate. Sixth: Be consistent. Update the chart immediately after the desired behavior for a younger child. Update the chart daily for your older child. Do so in the presence of your
child reiterating the goals of the program. Seventh: Be sure to recognize if the chosen reinforcement isn’t motivating enough and modify it. Children will loose interest if they don’t see or feel the rewards of their good behavior. Be flexible with the rewards.
Rewards and Consequences At the end of week, sit down with your
child and tally the points your
child has earned. Dibby out the rewards earned. Be encouraging and positive; pointing out a child’s achievement versus failure. Discuss areas for improvement. Be generous with points for the first few weeks of the program to let your
child bask in his/her success. Example of a weekly tally of points: • Less than 30 points: five 30 minute slots of TV, Choice of Dessert for one night • 30 - 60 points: eight 30 minute slots of TV, Choice of Dessert for two nights • More than 60 points: ten 30 minute slots of TV, Choice of Dessert for two nights and one trip to the ice cream parlor. A behavior modification program not only offers negative reinforcement to undesirable behaviors but also rewards positive behavior. The resultant chart offers a visual picture of your child’s success. Have
fun with the program.Negative behavior that isn’t a part of the behavior modification program still needs to be addressed. Use more conventional deterrents like time outs and groundings. Remember to be consistent and follow through with the program.
