20 Questions Couples Should Ask Before Marrying

With divorce rates hovering around the fifty percent mark, couples continue to find it difficult in today's fast paced world to make the commitment of marriage one they can fulfill. Though there are many factors that can bring on the painful dissolution of a marriage, the one that seems to be the most difficult to overcome is incompatibility. Often we find ourselves in the throes of passion, overcome by the idyllic dreams where passionate physical attraction and true love are one and the same. Sadly though, this rush of passion, combined with any one of a host of other factors - biological clocks that tick, tick, tick, the desperate need to share our lives with someone else, pressure to do the "grown-up" thing - can bring about a hasty proposition that is doomed by a lack of proper consideration. Love is a wonderful thing, it just isn't always enough for the long haul.

Relationship experts find that too many couples fail to ask the important questions. The reasons for this can vary from insecurity to denial, to the hope that everything will just work out. Here are some of the questions you may want to think about asking. This list is not absolute, tailor it to your own situation and be sure you are making an informed decision.

1) Do either, or both, of you want children, and if you do, who will be the primary care giver?

This is a big taboo question. This is the "we are moving too fast" question and the answer may not be as simple as yes or no. One or both of you may not yet know if children are something you want. Now is the time to share your thoughts on the idea.

2) Do you have a clear idea of each other's financial obligations, goals and ideas about spending and saving?

Many relationship experts view this issue as one of the top reasons relationships fail. People will tell you about their last visit to the doctor, child abuse, their deepest fears, but when it comes to the checkbook a veil of secrecy as thick as an iron curtain unfolds. Most couples will argue about money at some point, but if you disclose your financial secrets they will be less of a thorny issue in the future.