Hooray for Store-bought Halloween Costumes!

I know lots of moms
Supermoms
Who scrap together amazing costumes
From socks and pipe cleaners
Ribbon and Dad's old T-shirts
Moth-eaten hats and bathrobes
Spray-paint and curly wigs

Not me.

I could manage a couple of homemade ghost costumes
But, no,
Nobody wants to be a ghost
Why should they?

My daughter can be Cinderella
For $19.95.
My son can be a Clone Trooper
Wear his costume constantly
Shoot foam darts with his
Officially-licensed Star Wars blaster
For the cost of Pizza Hut delivery.

My kids won't win any costume contests
But I just don't care.
I never claimed to be supermom
(Though I always hoped my children would nominate me anyway)

How dare I call myself creative?
Why didn't I learn how to sew?

To prove I'm not a lazy loser
Should I make homemade candy
Cinnamon popcorn balls
Caramel apples
To pass out to trick-or-treaters?
Good parents wouldn't let their kids eat all that
Delicious hard work (hidden razor blades, poison)
Even if I did

So I think I'll stick to
Store-bought candy
Store-bought Halloween costumes--
Thank you, Wal-Mart!