VBAC: How to Talk to Your Spouse and Doctor

After the birth of my baby, I decided that I wanted to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) the next time around. The first order of business was to get my husband and doctor involved. This wasn't an easy thing to do. However, it needed to be done and I'll tell you how I made the talk go smoothly.

I did a lot of research.

Before I even brought up the idea of a VBAC to anyone, I did my homework. I made sure I knew the facts and know the reasons why I wanted to do this. Two good websites I used to get information are VBAC.com and Childbirth.org. I made sure to print out important pages so I went into my discussion prepared.

I got my husband on board first.

Like most spouses, my husband wanted to be involved, but he didn't know what he can do to help. I showed him the research I had done on VBAC and got him on board with me and my decision. I told him why I preferred to have a VBAC and used him as a warm-up before talking to the doctor.

I brought it up the very first appointment.

I talked to my doctor about VBAC at my very first appointment, so he knew what to expect when I went into labor. I took my husband and research along and used them both to back me up. My physician was a little hesitant at first, so I put him at ease by telling him how carefully I had thought this out.

I listened to my physician's concerns.

When I first brought VBAC up, my doctor had a list of reasons why he may not want to do one. I listened to him, and decided if there is any validity to what he was saying. I asked questions about each concern, to make sure I really had the reason he was hesitant. I wrote them down, went back to my research and discussed VBAC again with him at a later date.

I talked about VBAC more than once.

Just because I had brought it up the first appointment, it doesn't mean it stuck with the doctor. He sees a lot of people and deliveries every single day. I didn't bring up VBAC every appointment, but I made sure to talk about it enough that my doctor remembered. Also, I made a birth plan when I got into the third trimester and gave a copy of it to my doctor so he can keep it on file.

I was prepared to hear "no."