Empty Nest

This syndrome occurs when a woman has identified entirely with her role as wife, mother and homemaker and then these jobs come to an end. These are all wonderful jobs but somewhere in the process, the person, the individual, gets lost. When after 20 or so years of building a `nest' for her family to feel safe and secure in, it's suddenly dismantled with the departure of the last, adult child, the void can be enormous, not to be underestimated in the severity of its effect on the woman/wife/mother.

In any life, the individual goes through a series of developmental stages - childhood, teenage, early adult life, mid-life then the mature years. Each of these stages is accompanied by an identity crisis, during which we are forced to take stock of where we've been and reinvent ourselves for the future. For a woman, the 30s decade is particularly significant. It's a time of transformation, rebellion and psychological transition.

After this challenging but also energizing period, a woman is never the same again. She enters her more mature years with a stronger sense of Self and life-purpose, not content to be confined to set roles only. Her family must adjust to these changes which can be very bewildering to the woman herself. By the time her children are ready to move out, a woman is usually in her 40s or early 50s, a wise and wonderful older woman. Ah, but this is another life-stage that must be accepted and assimilated. It would be reasonable to expect that this is a time of liberation when a woman can finally be freed of her parental responsibilities, when she can finally have the time to explore her own interests and be her own person again. But the maternal hold is strong, the nostalgic longing for her small children very real and her empty nest and empty arms feel vast and un-fillable. What can ever fill this enormous empty landscape?

What are some common symptoms of empty-nest syndrome?

*Emptiness

*Depression

*Pessimism

*Withdrawal

*Loss of self-esteem

*Loneliness

So, how to combat these negative feelings?

Emptiness and loneliness: