V'Day Disasters Waiting to Happen: 7 Deadly Valentine Day's Gift Ideas

Ok guys. You have asked a million times over what you should get your girlfriend, wife, mistress for the ever demanding Valentine's holiday. I am going to make it easy by giving you a list of what NOT to buy her.

1. Gym memberships and excersise equipment- guys this insinuates that you are unhappy with your girl's figure...unless you are willing to listen to her cry for undetermined lengths of time, this is definitely a no go.

2. Cookbooks- these insinuate that you are more concerned with her domestic capabilities...not a good idea unless you are a fan of drive-thru and pizza delivery.

3. Clothes- now clothes aren't necessarily bad, however if you make the mistake of buying a size or two too large, it can be damaging. Clothing purchases require you to investigate, and that is more effort than any Hallmark holiday is worth.

4. Car accesories- although practical, not romantic. Remember, this is the day that makes or breaks newer relationships. Purchasing new floor mats may result in your never getting into her car or anything else for that matter again.

5. Adult toys- these are good overall, and double for adding a spark to a relationship that may be dwindling. However, buying items that will only benefit you ( you know what i'm talking about) make you seem like an orally fixated not to mention SELFISH lover.

6. Gift Certificates- the most impersonal, thoughtless gifts ever. This shows that either you forgot and are covering your butt at the last moment, or that you couldn't seem to be bothered.

7. Anything found at a gas station or convenience store- Granted, I agree that most are pretty sufficient as far as retail items are concerned now a days. Women however, don't find beef jerky or King size candy bars very appealing.

Hopefully this will help you in your plight, and keep you involved men off the couch.