Building Self-Esteem in Children: A Guide for Parents

There are a lot of problems that can get in the way of kids growing up to be mentally and physically healthy adults. Poor achievement in school, smoking, underage drinking, drug use, reckless driving, teen pregnancy, violent behavior … more often than not, these same problems are directly linked to how our children feel about themselves as individuals.

Identifying the Problem

Experts say over and over the same thing: Kids who get into trouble often exhibit one or more of the same personality traits –

1. Lack of self-confidence
2. Lack of self-discipline
3. Inability to avoid peer pressure
4. Need for acceptance
5. No sense of what the future holds
6. No sense of self-value to others

In short, they lack self-esteem.

It’s not just the “problem” kids who have self-esteem issues, either. You and I both know how many adults (sometimes even ourselves) suffer from low self-esteem. We also know that having a good perspective of ourselves means the difference between moving ahead, beyond problems, and falling behind, dwelling in our failures.

Building self-esteem is a lifelong process. Every new experience we have with other people, every success or failure we have in our personal lives, all the things that we do shape how we think of ourselves. It’s hard to think of ourselves as unique people with qualities and talents that make us special if our self-esteem is in the gutter.

For kids coming to terms with the very broad sketch of who they are, self-esteem can be a leading indicator of success in school and beyond.

So What Is Self-Esteem, and What Can I Do?