The Strip Club Dream

Dreams can be funny, exciting, or flat out weird. I will turn my little niche here on Associated Content into a dream journal of sorts. In my dreams I have fought tigers, bears, and lions to the death and much more crazier things. From flying to being shot, to a random hodgepodge of mini dreams. But today I share with you the last dream I had.

I walk into a strip club beginning my first day as a DJ. One problem is I don't really know what I'm doing. I don't know how to work the computer, I don't know the stripper's names.

One thing is I know the music is on a computer, yet I'm using some type of price scanner to scan CD's to play. I am not able to have another song ready after the first one plays, so after the first one ends the stripper is dancing to no music, the crowd is getting a little pissed.

There is a girl sitting beside me, and I have to ask her each stripper's name before they come up on stage. I still have a problem with getting a song to play immediately after the first one ends. I play this off by using reverse psychology on the patrons by making them feel like cheap bastards, thus they come out their pockets and begin to tip. At one point I asked the crowd what they wanted to hear to buy me some time to cue the next song. I hear them scream Bad Company, Skynyrd, and AC/DC.

At one point the most cracked out black stripper I have ever seen walks out on stage. She was at least 45 with a pencil thin mustache. No one was going to tip her. That was until I used this golden voice of mine to drum up some tip money from the customers. For some reason my voice was more of a ring announcer voice than a DJ voice. Amazing how the brain works in your sleep, the girl beside me told me a stripper's name was Lexia, I quickly introduce her as the luscious Lexia.

I have messed up quite a few times by this point. I am virtually assured of getting fired, yet I wonder why I was hired in the first place. This dream continues on, stripper's get on stage, the music doesn't work right. Then the dream just ends, I awake wondering what the hell that dream was all about.