Precious Life, Haunting Death

Driving the back roads outside of town, music up loud as always, it was a beautiful evening and I sat back in the seat relaxed as the landscape flew by like a peripheral video to the music. My head felt clear as it always does on the open road. I had my cell phone with me set to vibrate since I wouldn't hear the ring tone with the music blaring, and I felt it buzz beneath my leg. Something told me I should answer though I was reluctant to interrupt my time of solitude.
I could barely understand the female voice on the other end, she was crying hysterically. I quickly realized it was my friend Joe's sister, but all I could make out before the connection was lost was "shot himself". I immediately called the number back and got through, Joe's father answered this time, I could tell in his voice something was terribly wrong. "Earlier today Joe shot himself in the head, he is in surgery right now but it doesn't look good", he said in his monotone voice. I told him I was on my way, made a quick u-turn and headed for the city hospital.

When I arrived soon after, it seemed like all his family and friends were there, quite a crowd of people. I hugged his mom, sister and ex-wife, each clung to me as they cried; I was at a loss for words. His father shook my hand firmly and thanked me for coming but didn't say much else, he's always been a man of few words. I found it hard to hold back my own tears of shock and grief, but I've never been one to cry in front of others, yet my throat was tight with the strain of holding back my emotions.

After a few hours and no word yet, it was growing late and though I hated to leave, I needed to make the long drive home. I hugged Joe's mom, shook his dad's hand again and asked them to keep me informed, they thanked me for coming. As I headed for the elevator I thought I could hold in all the welling emotions, but as I pressed the button for the parking garage, alone in the elevator, the damn broke and I started sobbing. I made it to my car hoping not to run into anyone who might see my display of emotions, and sat inside for a few minutes crying harder until I felt empty and exhausted. I gathered myself and headed toward the exit.