Teaching Manners to Your Children

Business etiquette coaching and consulting is big business nowadays. Part of the reason is the changing world and diverse cultures working together for the first time. Another reason is new technology (think Blackberrys or Ipods). We aren't quite sure how these new toys fit into a respectful business environment sometimes. And another reason is that parents forgot to teach basic manners to their children.

In some cases, parents even pass on a message that manners are boring, old fashioned, a waste of time, or only to be used on people who can assist you in some way. A school of thought arose in the 1960's that manners were oppressive. I still hear a lot of parents refuse to teach their children to call adults "Mr." or "Mrs." or "Miss" as we use here in the South for any adult female.

I have two girls under five years old. I want them to grow up with a basic understanding of etiquette and manners without having to send them to military or charm school. I, like most parents, would like them to be polite and respectful without turning mealtimes into battlegrounds.

Merriam-Webster defines manners as "social conduct or rules of conduct as shown in the prevalent customs." But we really don't need to hire a descendant of Emily Post or hire a local version of Miss Manners to help our children to be successful in most social or business situations.

According to a wide variety of parenting, business consulting , and etiquette experts, guess what is the number one way to teach respect and manners? By modeling proper manners, that's how. So often, we forget to use basic, everyday manners in our lives with our children. We are in a hurry; they are dawdling; our minds are on other things, like work; they are just kids; and so on.

Children learn best by imitating a loved caretaker. So, if courtesy is used in their environment, your children will act accordingly. However, you will probably need to remind your children of the little "rules" of etiquette many, many times.