Calling All Men: What Not to Buy Her for Valentine's Day

Most men, when it comes to Valentine's gifts...are clueless. Take my friend "Steve" (I am changing names to protect the guilty here). Last Valentine's Day, his wife "Brenda" mentioned that she'd put on a few extra pounds since the birth of their son, and would really like to get back into an exercise program and see if she couldn't get it off.
Steve took this as a hint, which it wasn't, and off he went with their three children to the local Wal-mart. He allowed their daughter to help him pick out several pairs of colorful exercise shorts and matching spandex tops. The spandex looked little, so he decided to buy an X-Large in everything to make sure it fit. Time out...did I mention that Brenda might weigh 110 pounds soaking wet?

Then it was off to the shoe department where the middle son chose a pair of aerobic trainers. Steve was ecstatic with his choice, because the shoes even had the little colored tabs that Brenda could switch out to match each of her new outfits.

The next stop was sporting goods, where he loaded up a pink rubber Yoga mat, a selection of weights, a jump rope, a fitness ball and a small trampoline. As he started out of the aisle, he saw a set of scales on an end cap that were on sale, and quickly added those to his loot.

"Mommy's going to be so happy with me!" He announced to the baby, who simply gurgled at him as they headed to Electronics. Locating the Fitness DVD's, he found a series of Pilates and Abdominal burners in a nice boxed set, with a full 2 hours of work-outs on each of the 8 disks.

He took the kids to McDonalds and fed them hamburgers and milkshakes, went home and wrapped his gifts. "For once" he thought to himself, "I don't have to worry that I got her the wrong thing."

Ladies, I know that by now, you've probably laughed yourself into hysterics and the guys are still wondering what Steve did wrong.