Why I Am Persona Non-Grata at the Giant

Having found no sugar for my coffee in the office, and being annoyed at this extreme shortage of a required commodity, I went to the local supermarket (the GIANT) to replenish the supply.

Upon entering the store I grabbed a red hand basket and proceeded to the spices aisle where I procured a 5 pound bag of sugar on isle 6 and dropped it in. I next realized, being the gourmet that I am, that I would rather have some flavored non-dairy creamer. So I wandered over to aisle 1 and got a few cartons of my favorite low fat hazelnut blend.

Since I also wanted to get some bottled water. I went over to the other end of the store, around aisle 20 to find some. The clerk in that aisle thought the water was over in aisle 16 so I went over there. No luck.

Now, while this was happening, you know how you hear announcements in supermarkets when people drop things? "clean up on aisle X" and the like? Well this was happening but I just was only dimly aware of it. The first I remember hearing was, "clean-up on aisle 6." Well, I didn't drop anything so I did not even think about it.

The next announcement, somewhat more frantic was "two staff to aisles 2 through 12, bring dust mops and brooms!" Again, I didn't do anything so this was just background noise to me.

In the meantime, since the water was NOT in aisle 16, I found out it was in aisle 17 so I went over there and got my favorite bottled spring water. That task having been completed, I proceeded down aisle 17 to the front of the store, and across the front of the entire huge store to checkout counter number 1 which was for the "10 items or less" shopper, which I surely was one.

Now the announcements of the store manager are even more frantic, "Six stock room staff with mops and brooms to aisles 12-20 back of the store, all remaining personnel proceed to the front of the store for additional clean up."

"Hmmmm, I says to myself, must be quite a mess!"

As I am standing in line, my shoes are starting to feel a bit "grainy" and the customer behind me says "Do you know, sir, that your bag of sugar is leaking?"