Why Britney Spears Should Go Out with Hugh Hefner and Where They Should Go

It's a well-known fact that Britney Spears made Kevin Federline sign a pre-nuptial agreement prior to their now-dissolved marriage. As a result of that wonderful agreement K-Food now gets about $1 million from the divorce settlement, according to recently published reports, instead of the billons he would have preferred.

And now that Spears has now sent an APB to all interested parties that they: A. must sign a pre-nup and B. enjoy the finer things in life like Wal-Mart and nachos with extra cheese from 7-Eleven, what better way for her to make a serious hook-up than with Hef?

Hugh loves his French vanilla Coffeemate, Beef n' Cheddars at Arby's and Pepsi. Though he's not as well versed in matters such as proper etiquette for choosing Slurpee flavors and drawers that say "Pimpdaddy" on the ass, he's only 80 and can still learn.

After all, he already has shared living quarters with about-and I'm just guesstimating here-200 women, including Kendra, who is about as close to Spears as one can possibly get, sans singing voice.

And if Hef should get tired of Spears? Well, just call in his daughter, Christie, the brains of the operation and the Playboy empire. She'll figure out a way for him to get his R & R and Spears can go back to what she does best: Las Vegas.

Of course she already loves Sin City and what better way for Brit to experience it than in Hef's $40,000 per night suite in The Palms casino! And after she has spent upwards of about 1/1,000,000 of Hef's money, not including her own, or about $10 million US, she can return to Hef's (now her) mansion and discuss the finer points of the NFL with Kendra, fluffy kitties with Bridget and gag gifts with Holly, though I'd advise Britney to keep her loving comments to a minimum around the boss bitch.

If she can do all of that with aplomb and stay out of Hef's hair, then she may finally be the one who can tame the Playboy founder and publisher and live happily ever after-until Holly figures out a way to off her.