Damn You Web Cam Tramps!

When I check My Space daily I will have new messages or new friend requests. When I see that I begin to ponder who from my past may have wrote me, and since I have dial up I have a while to ponder after I click on the new messages or friends. Maybe Tim Lorick got the internet? My hot Fourth grade teacher maybe? The possibilities are endless. But the outcome the same.

Damn web cam whores!

Oh yeah, they will send me a message saying they are new to town and liked my profile. And these girls must not be creative at all because they all send the exact same message. Friend request with some chick on a bed with hooker clothes on. I am not against whores, by any means. But the last time I checked, my computer did not have a vagina.

I mean come on, I know the trick, send the things to enough people and somewhere in America Brian Walter signs up for your web cam. But target me? When my default pic is me pointing to a sign that says "Happy Birthday Jesus"? That should be a clue that I am against whoredom.

But I'm not against whoredom, just web cam tramps.

The women who are freely giving of their loving woman-ness are prevalent here in South Carolina. Almost as if they were bred to be gutter tramps. All I would have to do is walk through a local trailer park with a sixer of Pabst Blue Ribbon, bumping some Lynard Skynyrd, and the trashy harlots would be on me like Uncle Billy on Cousin Shelly.

See I'm smart. You web cam girls can't trick me. Keep it up, your efforts show a trace of hard work. But I am quick to deflect those who go for my wallet.

Why don't you girls get a real job like me? I write on this website and try to get people to help me transfer my money from Zimbabwe since I am a Prince there.

Where is the guy who has all cam girls for his friends on MySpace? He's gotta be out there somewhere. Sure, I may have Dirk Diggler and Booger as friends. But, there has to be a mega-loser, snot running down his nose, week long unwashed underwear, a collection of used tissues in the background with a gaggle of web cam girls as buddies.

That guy would be pitiful, and I would like to see him.

Back to the topic.