Weight Gain in Relationships and the Art of Supporting a Dieting Wife or Girlfriend

"You know, when I met Jan, she was a tiny little thing. She sure plumped up when she got herself a man."

I looked over at my friend Bob, who had just made this observation. I wasn't sure whether to ignore him, or check his forehead to see if maybe a temperature was making him delusional.

"Jan" is Bob's wife. They're still in the newlywed phase of their marriage. For someone who has "plumped up" recently, she still looks pretty good in a pair of jeans. I decided Bob needed to get his eyes checked, pointed out that I didn't remember him having that beer gut back when he and Jan started dating, and changed the topic to football.

But I found myself thinking about that brief exchange later. There's some truth to the fact that many couples gain a bit of weight once they settle into the routine of a "twosome." Is weight gain a natural side effect of love? Does regular sex and someone to cuddle at night have the same impact on our bodies as living on Big Macs?

If you believe the women's beauty advice columns in some magazines or the banter of men in bars, you're more inclined to think that women just go out of their way to stay slim when they're single. We're conditioned to believe that men want the supermodel body, so we starve and Stairmaster our way into creating one while we're on the prowl for Mr. Right. When he comes along, and we've got him snared, we celebrate by shoveling in mass quantities of chocolate and cream cheese.

After all, he's ours now.

Somehow, I don't think that's really the way it happens.

So, Why The Weight Gain?

Contrary to male belief, your girlfriend or wife didn't have some grand master plan to pack on the pounds after she had you hooked. We like to look good in our favorite little black dress, whether we're on your arm or not.

But eating with you makes us fat.