Finding Public Restrooms When You Need to Pee

"Restrooms are for customers only." How often have you read those words? How meanly, how absolutely cruelly do they jump out at you in your moment of need? As your bladder becomes more and more insistent and you look up and down the endless rows of retail establishments and curse yourself for indulging in that second double latte, you more and more desperately search for someplace to provide you with a little relief.

Don't get caught in the cold again. I can provide the definitive guide to public restrooms, places where the staff might look the other way, and places where you can blend in easily with legitimate customers. It is my gift of charitable humanity, for there is no one more snappish and down right garrulous than someone who needs to take a leak. Believe me, as the woman with the smallest bladder on the planet, I have made an art out of finding places to pee.

The first thing you need to do is survey your environment. Here is what you're looking for: government buildings, hotels, large bookstores (Borders Books and Music, Barnes and Noble, any bookstore large enough to house a café inside), bars, coffee houses, large restaurants, department stores, college campuses and malls.