The Swim Dress

I have always looked forward to the changing seasons we have here in Maine. In the spring, the snow melts leaving a beauty that Monet would be hard pressed to capture. After our glorious fall, we drag out our Christmas decorations and give Chevy Chase a run for his money. My least favorite season is now lurking around the corner, and once again, I find myself preparing for the onset of thousands of ant-like tourists flip-flopping their way throughout town. Although trips to local stores will be white knuckled, teeth-clenching drives tailored to right hand turns only, I deal with it. When a simple stroll to the post office becomes a life threatening duel with bicyclists and baby carriages, I take it in stride. My real aversion to the summer seasons in Maine can be summed up in two words....bathing suit.

In youthful carefree days of summer, I remember grabbing a bikini off the rack and looking like Annette in a Beach Blanket Bingo movie. Those memories, possibly a little exaggerated, have fallen victim to the ravages of time. There have been many constantly surfacing imperfections to be considered, so last year I settled for a more moderate fashion called the swim dress. I admit, the selection was somewhat limited, but it cut down on decision making, and I finally found an acceptable possibility. When I tried it on, I thought all I needed was some frilly knickers and a parasol to epitomize the style of the late eighteen hundreds, but after a few turns in front of the mirror, it grew on me. Recalling my harrowing experience with a do-it-yourself bikini hot wax kit was the clincher. I never found one with sleeves, but I figured if full blown whales squeezed into bikinis could avoid prosecution, I could go sleeveless. For seventeen bucks, I could throw it away if I changed my mind. When my grand nieces saw my purchase, their horrified faces led me to believe they would not be accompanying me to the beach any longer. My sister said she would need a longer clothesline. My grand nephew was enthralled by the fact that my swim dress stood up by itself.