Good Parenting: A Child's Self Esteem

Today, I am a 24-year-old Ivy League graduate. I am 5'6, and slim. I have long fine ebony hair and what people call a million dollar smile. I look great on the outside, but inside I am delicate. I get sad when money is tight and insecure when my boss at work yells at me. I am a budding young woman, but on the inside I feel like a little girl just waiting to wipe away the tears and finally grow up.

I do not believe that parents are solely responsible for the end product of their child, but I do think that they play a large role in the development process. If I were to give my parents suggestions on what they might have done differently, I would begin by first talking about unconditional acceptance. Most people in this world are looking for acceptance. They want to be accepted by their friends, coworkers, husbands, wives, and especially their parents. You might think that you are accepting your child, but ask yourself this question. If your child were to come up to you and tell you that they are no longer going to school anymore what would be your first reaction? Would it be one of love and acceptance or would you be happy with first blowing your stack and then coming back later and apologizing? Your first reaction in that situation could have an effect on your child for the rest of his or her life. How you respond could make the difference between your child running to their friends in a time of need and running to you.

Words have more impact than you think. In an article titled "Words Words Words" columnist and small business owner Nan S. Russell says, "Poorly chosen words can kill enthusiasm, impact self-esteem, lower expectations and hold people back. Well chosen ones can motivate, offer hope, create vision, impact thinking and alter results."