The Ten Best Songs You've Never Heard

It seems like every time I mention a groovy song to a friend or acquaintance, they say something like "Huh. I've never heard that." And that makes me sad, because so many people are missing out on some glorious tunes. So here, as a service to you, is my list of the best songs you've never heard. In no particular order, because I'm just too much of a music geek to pick favorites:
Soul Asylum's Artificial Heart

Soul Asylum got fairly popular back in '93 with the release of their album, Grave Dancer's Union, and the hit singles "Runaway Train", "Somebody to Shove", and "Black Gold". Not many people know, though, that before they were radio-friendly they were a pretty awesome garage punk band. Their song "Artificial Heart" is a bluesy, bass-heavy tune with a sing-song-y melody, about the misfortune of a young girl from a trailer park, and you guessed it-what happens to her and her artificial heart. It's a bizarre little song with Tim Burton-esque lines like "With a needle and thread, they sewed on her head; and her arms and legs, and all the rest, they said."

Another Soul Asylum tune, Religiavision

If the Dead Kennedys' Jello Biafra and Soul Asylum's Dave Pirner had a kid, it would grow up and sing this song. It's a loud and fast and bitingly cynical ode to fast-talking television evangelists and the people who blindly follow them.

Nirvana's Marigold

One of the so-called lost songs, this one features a rare vocal performance by Dave Grohl. It's a simple little song, but somehow haunting. It sounds best turned up loud on a good stereo; if you pay attention, the guitar sounds almost like a windchime at times.

Jimmy Buffett's My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, and I Don't Love Jesus

This is a fun little song, kind of a rockabilly tune-it sounds like he should be sitting in a saloon playing the piano and singing it. It's a tribute to that great equalizer, the hangover. Jimmy summons up the strength to head out to get some chocolate milk, and bravely swears that if he doesn't "die by Thursday, I'll be roarin' Friday night".

Everclear's Thrift Store Chair