Dean & Dave at Easter

So there we were, me and Dave (no, the other Dave). We were on our way to the mall to check out the Bed, Bath & Beyond. We were kind of unclear as to what that might entail. After all, beyond is a sort of open ended concept. For all we knew beyond could mean that the store was full of half-naked dancing girls. We weren't really expecting that mind you, but what the hell, a boy's got to dream.

Anyway, there we were, wandering through the mall, two proud examples of the American consumer. I stopped by the Tinderbox cause I needed to check out the Zippos. I had lost mine about a week ago in an ugly incident involving some Hare Krishnas and the Sunday paper. I couldn't hack using that pathetic Bic any longer so I was in the market. Dave continued on to check out a sale at Radio Shack, Dave's a geek you see. He covers it up well enough mind you, and the chicks don't seem to notice, but a geek is what he is. I've seen him get all worked up over a sale on rewriteable CD's at Fry's.

As I watched the Zippos spin around in their glass case I thought how nice it was to finally have a quiet day without having to deal with any ugliness. Dave and I are really pacifists at heart. Sure we get into the occasional scrape now and then, but we never initiate them. We just want to be left alone to live our quiet little lives. So we tend to be a tad indiscriminate in the marital status of the women we chat up. Does this make us bad guys? The way their husbands react you'd think it does.

So there I was, lost in my reverie, when Dave comes running up all out of breath. He started babbling about being attacked by a giant rabbit over by the food court and making no sense whatsoever. I had to smack him upside the head with the display case six or seven times before we would calm down and tell me what had happened.