America's Next Top Model's Cycle 8: Der? What?

Last week's two-hour premiere of America's Next Top Model's Cycle 8 (what a mouthful!) was not worth the time invested. What did viewers get to see but a bunch of fame-hungry girls in skimpy bathing suits claiming that they had what it takes to make it to the top. And then when some girls' dreams were busted within the first hour, they cried or yelled or made up excuses. One girl claimed that you needed personality, apparently, not looks, and that was why she didn't get called back. Oh-kay?

That was just the introduction to the stupidity that went on for the rest of the show. Viewers met Kathleen, the first to get voted off, who apparently has a thing for fur: "I like fur. It makes you look hot," she told cameras. Later, when defending her for-fur stance in front of the judges panel, Kathleen said, "Animals die of natural causes just like humans." Twiggy set the poor dear straight: "Yes, but those aren't the animals they use for fur." "Oh," Kathleen said, "I didn't know that."

There seems to be a lot these girls don't know like constructive criticism, personality (lack of it got Samantha kicked off last night's episode), and taking responsibility for one's photo shoots. Renee is a big fan of making excuses. She blamed her poor picture, which the judges seemed to like, on not knowing how to be a class-clown while all the other girls got photo assignments tailored to their personalities. Uhm, it's called being versatile, Renee. Or is that word too big for you?

Speaking of big words, Russian mail-order bride Natasha doesn't understand anything. Both photo shoots have left her confused by a language barrier and when last night's runway challenge judge used the word "cognizant" when describing her runway behavior (she was "less than cognizant", he said), I cringed watching her expressionless face.