How to Overcome Age Difference in a Relationship

How to Overcome Age Difference in a Relationship

March 22, 2007 by
Kristina Jones  
Kristina Jones
Kristina Jones
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Age Gap  |  Overcome
Are you in a relationship with someone much younger or older than you? If so, it does not mean your relationship is doomed to fail, you have to work to make it successful. I know how hard it is because my husband is nearly 12 years older than me. To make the relationship work, you must be
 able to overcome the age gap. This guide will help you overcome this age gap and make your relationship successful.

Overcoming Age Difference Step 1 - Identify Why You Are Together

Before you can overcome the age difference, you must identify what attracts you to the person. Is it the person's personality or other factor? You have to remember why you decided to make this person a part of your life. You also must take time to analyze what about you is attractive to your partner. Maybe you are sophisticated or easy going. Make sure to acknowledge why you are together and with what your special connection is held together.

Overcoming Age Difference Step 2 - Understanding Where Your Partner is in Life

Step 2 in the process is to understand what phase in life your partner is at. Your partner may not be at the same place in life as you. Maybe your older partner has left his or her partying days behind and enjoys nice cozy nights inside and you just enjoy partying and vice-versa. As part of overcoming the age difference you must accept the fact your partner may not enjoy every activity you would like to experience because he or she may have already experienced the activity. Acknowledging these differences can make a world of difference in your relationship.

Overcoming Age Difference Step 3 - Voice Your Needs and Wants

Communicate your needs and wants. People have different needs and wants at different stages of their life. If your partner does not understand why you must do something a certain way or want to take part in some activity, you can become miserable. You must find the best way to communicate with your partner and give yourself a voice. Being voiceless and letting the other person in the relationship make all the decisions will set the relationship up for disaster.

Overcoming Age Difference Step 4 - Compromise

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Takeaways
  • Learning to see beyond the age difference can make your relationship work.
  • Overcoming an age difference takes time and hard work.
  • Both partners need to be active in identifying needs, wants, and phases of life.
 
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I'm speaking to a 15year old while i just turned 18. I really want things to work out but her family started to flip about the age Differences Maybe it's Right for them to be tripping about it.But i just turned 18 do any of you have a suggestion ? please reply and let me hear your Options.
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Posted on 10/25/2008 at 12:10:43 AM

im 15 now, at the time i was going out with my ex i was 14 turning 15 in a few months, and he'd just turned 18.. we ended it because of the age gap, even though i didnt see it as a problem.. even after 6 months or so apart, i still feel for him, and i know in my heart that i love him. We still talk to one an other sometimes, but i really feel like i need to let him know how i feel, regardless of the concequences. I would like to make him see that it really doesnt matter.. and i feel like i should tell him, as two different ppl have spoken to his sister, 3 including me... and she has said that she has walked in on him reading my valentines card on several occations. A little advice pleeease... lol
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Posted on 10/20/2008 at 10:10:38 AM

I am 5 years older than my boyfriend, and at the time it was good, cause he seemed to want to the same thing, but he moved jobs and now we are constantly fighting cause deep down I know he wants to go out, and I dont. I have never been interested in clubbing, so i cant really understand, but its who he goes out that bugs me. All the girls at his work are young, prettier and skinnier, I continuously compare myself to them. I am very emotional so I cry about the situation alot, But i dont want to, does anyone have any suggestions for me. The girls he hangs out with think im being unfair too, someone help me : (
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Posted on 09/05/2008 at 3:09:52 PM

Thank you so much for the advice. I'm actually 14 and the guy I have feelings for just turned 18. Things are a little bad right now because I did tell him I was 15 at first. He got mad but already told me before that age is just a number. I was a little nervous when we hungout the first time. We went to the movies and he held my hand. I was freaking out and right then and there I knew he was the one for me. Some people say it's hard to tell at this age if your in love or just simply have a case of infaution, but I think you can just feel it. Like you know for sure that this person could bring you happiness for the rest of your life. It shoulden't matter, what age you are-you can find love. Wether he's 30 and your 20..it dosen't matter. And I'm hoping the guy that I want to be with right now is not letting our age difference affect what we feel for eachother. We have such amazing chemistry and I would hate to see an age difference ruin that. I also have advice too"Do what you love and j
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Posted on 08/30/2008 at 12:08:58 AM

Excellent!
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Posted on 08/06/2008 at 11:08:30 AM

im dating a man 13 years older then me, it has been tough, but i lov ehim and dont want to live without him, but the age is starting to make me miserable, he is so rigid in his ways and so much more serious than me, its hard to dealwith because i just wnat to laugh and have fun, different stages i guess, i dont know if we will last. its sad though :(
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Posted on 07/22/2008 at 5:07:06 AM

Good article. I have an article of a similar nature that might appeal to some of your readers. Here's a link: http://www.socyberty.com/Relationships/Sizable-Age-Differences-in-Couples.96696
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Posted on 03/23/2008 at 9:03:18 AM

This article was very helpful to me also. Im currently talking to a girl who is 26 and I am 19 and she admits that she is a little worried about the age difference. To be perfectly honest Im a little nervous about the whole thing too, but I really like the girl so Im more than willing to try and get past it. Ive been told that I am quite mature for my age and she admits that as well. So hopefully after reading this article we can just discuss the age issue a little more and hopefully it will not be an issue for much longer.
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Posted on 02/19/2008 at 10:02:44 AM

I am dating a guy who is a 21 year old law student. I met him out in a club. I am 32. When I met him I thought that he was around 27 years old and he thought I was around 25. He looks older than his age and is very mature in his outlook and I look a lot younger than my age and still have a fun approach to life. I never think of the age gap until he mentions a date or a song from a certain year and I think what am i doing?? But these moments are too infrequent to matter
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Posted on 01/05/2008 at 1:01:16 PM

I have been together with someone for almost 1 year. We are thinking to get married and have a kid. But, I am 28 and he is 45. Sometimes 17 age difference is scaring me when I think of some health problems he might have in the next years. After I read this article and the comments (real stories), I feel a little bit comfortable. Thank you
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Posted on 08/30/2007 at 6:08:00 AM

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