My Biggest Secret

Only a few of my close friends and family know what I'm about to share with you and the whole world. The madness started when I was a child. I didn't think it was that bad, but as the years pass by, I now know, I have an addiction. Let me take you through the sad reality of a candy addict.

The first memory that I have of my crazy addiction is when my family would take me to the movies. I HAD to have gummy bears. Oh, how I loved the Care Bear gummy bears in the blue box. They were delicious. I would fantasize about eating them during the 20 minute car ride to the theaters. Everyone else was jumping for joy about the popcorn and nachos, but not me, just give me the sugar.

I never thought of my candy fetish as a problem. Just like some needs beer, coffee or their cigarettes, I need that satisfying feeling of sugars running through my veins. During High School, I stayed with the gummy bears, but soon I needed something a little more harder. I started in on the Jolly Ranchers. That wonderful taste of green apple on my tongue was like nothing I've ever experienced. I also had the same love for the cherry flavor. You could keep watermelon and grape. I'd only eat them if I had a fit and nothing else to sooth my hunger for sugar. Chocolate was never an issue with me then, but as I said, with each passing year, my addiction grows larger.

Many friends worry about my uncontrollable desire for the sweet stuff. Many fear I will get diabetes, and others worry my teeth will rot out. No matter how much they try to help, I am not ready to give up my craving. I just can't set the Sour Patch Kids down. Like anyone else with an addiction, you have to want to give it up. Nobody can change you unless you want to be changed. I say over and over that I want to cut this out of my life. I've even been able to stay clean for a couple of days. It's not until a stressful events goes on in my life, or something awesome happens that I want to either reward myself or comfort myself. It's a tragic cycle that I can not come to grips with.