My Biggest Secret

How do you confess to your loved ones that your life is a lie? That question rang in my head as my cell doors slammed shut. It was July 14, 2006 and I had just been arrested. Again! My family knew nothing of the shame I carried daily and how was I going to tell them?

To tell the story, you have to start at the beginning. My parents always loved me but seemed to favor my brother. He got in trouble and I got blamed. When I was in 7^th grade my parents were fired from their jobs and my mom was arrested for embezzlement. Life went from bad to worse in the years that followed. My mom, with a new felony conviction under her belt, and Dad were both out of work and faced with supporting a family. We lost everything! My childhood home, the car, and were forced to start over.

In August of 2000 I left for college. I moved 600 miles from home with a bright outlook and a chance at an amazing future. Six months into college I got pregnant and dropped out. I was married to the father of my son and new hardships started over again. We shouldn't have gotten married and my life of lies would soon begin.

In 2002, I got my first real job. I worked at a grocery store as a cashier. I am a people pleaser and a bit of a kiss ass and within months I was promoted to Store Accountant. If you have ever worked in a grocery store than you know that the money is plentiful and the temptation was just too hard to resist. My husband and I were struggling to raise our child on a low income and living in his parent's house. In the course of three days I stole $13,500. I wasn't careful about it and was smug when it took them 8 months to figure out the money had gone missing. I was arrested and charged with 2 counts of embezzlement which was later pled down to misdemeanor larceny charges. I never told a sole about the money or the arrest. Don't ask me how you conceal an arrest from your husband but I did it.

The lies started snowballing. When he asked why I didn't go to work. I lied. I started leaving the house everyday. And my trouble only continued. When I was out pretending to be working, I lied to everyone. I told his parents they needed to baby-sit, I told him I was working, and I told my mom how much I loved my job.