What You See is What You Get: Stop Dating a Man for His "Future Potential"

Too many women date men, not for who they are now, but for who they know this man can be. You know his "Future Potential". Unfortunately, this can cause a woman some serious problems, and a great deal of heartache down the road. I myself, have met very few women that actually have the attitude, that they want a man just the way they are. It seems like, as soon as they seriously get interested in a man, the wheels start turning. The "Potential" wheel, that voice that says, "I know I can make him into the man he should be". Wanna bet?

What you see is what you get, is what it's all about. NO one can change anyone else. Not by nudging, nagging, pleading, coercing, crying, or even by sexual wiles. I'm not saying a man can't conform, especially if there is something in it for him, but conforming is not changing. Besides, isn't hoping that someday this man will be everything you want him to be, a little bit like gambling with your life? Do you really want to take that chance? It would be so much better and wiser to find a man who's just the way you want him now.

Many women who fall into this trap, have started down the desperate path. They are so afraid they won't find a man by a certain age, they start looking for any man, and figure they'll just turn him into what they really want. Shame on you. This is true desperation, as well as arrogance, thinking you could mold this man into your own personal Prince Charming. I know the old saying, "A Bird In The Hand", but this isn't a cliche, this is your life and his. Besides, how much would you really respect this man, if he allowed you to twist him into knots, untill he came out right? The point is, you wouldn't respect him. That's one of the serious problems you may be creating. After all, can anybody truly be happy with someone they don't respect?