How to Handle the Grief on Mother's Day when Your Mom Has Passed Away

Positive Thoughts, Memories, and Rituals Can Really Help!

One of the hardest things in life is to lose your mother. On Mother's Day it's even harder. I lost my mother 21 years ago. This was the most devastating thing in life that I ever ever experienced. The first Mother's Day without my mom was excruciating. I didn't know what to do, think or feel, other than horrible pain. How was I ever gonna keep facing, every Mother's Day, year after year. It was unimaginable. I was so close with my mom. Over the years I have found different ways of dealing with the grief. I had too, or I would have never survived. Although the canyon in your heart can never be filled as once before, Mother's Day can be manageable and actually joyful once again. I know, if you just recently lost your mom it seems impossible, but it can happen.

I remember one of the very first things I did many years ago, was to buy flowers for my mom. Not to put on her grave, that I couldn't do, because I lived in Arizona and my mom was buried in New york. I went out and bought my mom's favorite colored carnations, pink. I set them on a little table and told my mom they were for her. Oddly Yenough, this gave me such a sense of peace, thinking I could still buy my mother something for Mother's Day. Sometimes, at least still having the ritual of the gift, can make you feel better. You may also want to go to a place that was very special for you and your mom. There you can remember all the fun and special times you had going there together. After all, we are creatures of habit, and this can give you a sense of security. Loosing a mom is hard but also losing all the things you use to do for your mom is an additional loss. So, make sure that you do something special for your mom on Mother's Day. This will keep the good memories in your heart.