Helping Your Children With Homework

When my daughter was ready to enter the third grade, her teachers and principals decided that she was well ahead of her class, and wanted to put her in the Gifted & Talented (GT) program. I wasn’t exactly shocked because I knew that my daughter was intelligent, but I’d never heard of the GT program before, and I had several questions.

I was told that the GT students learned through application rather than through literal work. I asked, “What on earth does a third grader need to apply?” but he said that it was a great program, so I agreed to my daughter’s involvement.

Of course, I had no way of knowing that when the principal said that the students would learn to apply, it meant that the parents would be doing most of the work.

Throughout the course of Jenny’s third grade year, she was assigned a total of fifteen book reports, eight diaramas, twelve oral reports, and nine visual aids. Plus, every week the students were given four word problems to complete for their math class, and we spent many a night trying to calm Jenny down as she cried over Train A and Car B. It was a nightmare.

But when it comes to children and their homework, how much involvement should parents have? And should parents assist children with their creative projects? I met with Jenny’s third grade teacher to ask these questions and I received a rather conclusive answer: no.

The teachers at Jenny’s elementary school claimed that parents should not help their children with homework at all, and if students had questions about the assignment, then they should ask their teacher the following morning in class. Of course, if the assignment is due the next day, then they will receive a failing grade because they were unable to go to their parents for help.

What I have finally deduced is that parents should help their kids with their schoolwork, but no one should mention it to the teachers. It sounds underhanded and immoral, but that is the only conclusion I could reach, and any feedback on the subject would be appreciated.