My Biggest Secret

Everybody looks at me and sees this popular girl. They think that I have my life together and get jealous of me. Society sees that I have a job, people to call my friends, and have an idea of what I want to do with myself in the future. What they don't realize is that it's all a lie.

I get bored of things too easily. I can't seem to see anything in my future for a long term thing. Most girls my age know what they want to do for work, have a general idea of where they want to live and if not a specific person at least a general idea about that person that they want to spend their entire life with. I try to picture my future and all I see is blackness. I have no idea where I want to live, who I want to be with, if anybody at all, or what I want to do for work. The fact is that I can't imagine having a job for more than a couple years at a time. I like the idea of writing because it's never the same. I finish one thing and move on to the next.

My bosses at work keep talking to me about the benefits that I'll get. Health, dental, vision, 401K. It all goes in one ear and out the other because I keep thinking about how by the summer I won't be at this job anymore. I'm only working there to save up enough money to move away from this god-forsaken town. I plan on moving to the beach with a friend and spend the summer drinking and relaxing while working as little as possible.