Sudden Infant Death and the Impact on Surviving Siblings

How the Death of a Newborn or Infant Can Impact Surviving Children

Death is a powerful event in all of our lives leaving many of us to question our own mortality and our spiritual beliefs about life beyond. For children, many of the experiences and emotions connected to the death process are often associated with their own witness of a parent's response. As a parent, when caring for a child who has experienced a close death, either in a family or within a social network, it is important to understand the impact death will have on the child's emotional welfare.

While medical technology continues to be advancing, there are many children, each day, who experience the death of a sibling, either at birth or later in life. Often, and especially in the case of a newborn death, parents may often feel they carry the blame for the death of a newborn. While, in the majority of cases this is simply not the case, parents should work to focus on the expressions of their own grief and guilt, especially in the presence of surviving children. Overwhelmed with grief and a sense of loss, when a parent blames themselves, medical professionals and even God, their surviving children will do the same and express grief and sadness at these same individuals.

To assist both parents and surviving children, in the loss of a newborn infant, there are some important healing processes that should take place within the structure of the family. First, many grief counselors recommend the newborn child be given a name and that name be related to the surviving children. From this, the family can create a memory book filled with writings on the emotions associated with the loss. While this seems rather morbid, it allows both parents and children to offer a memory to the newborn child and also work through the emotions on paper. Additionally, ask the hospital staff to prepare a birth certificate with foot prints to place in the memory book as a way to mark the birth and short life of the newborn.