Best Character on South Park

Comedy Central's hit television show "South Park" has a magnificent cast of characters, yet one character truly epitomizes the wild and edgy cartoon. And his name is Eric Cartman. Here is why Eric Cartman is the best character on "South Park."

Cartman, the best character on "South Park," is obscenely overweight, yet he blames it on big bones, a theory which is advanced by his complete slut of a mother, who allows her obese child to push her around like a overzealous prison guard. Cartman is loud, often obnoxious, and he is a rabid anti-Semite. He hates hippies and loves Mel Gibson. He would do whatever it takes to top his archenemy and so-called friend, Kyle.

It is Cartman's utter outrageousness that makes him so popular among "South Park" fans. Whether he is plotting some diabolical plan or trying to get himself out of a jam, Cartman is hysterical to watch. He is best when he is trying to manipulate Butters (a not-so-difficult task). Eric Cartman has convinced the naive Butters that he was a robot, that he was a ghost who came back from the dead, that the world was its end, and most recently, well... Let's just say there were some photos Cartman didn't want released to the public and leave it at that.

Cartman's ignorance is only surpassed by his brilliance. Indeed, he is a contradiction. Close-minded enough to see things in only black and white, yet free-thinking enough to orchestrate a plan where a fellow student, a bully from an upper grade, would eat his own parents in a bowl of chili.

Why do Stan, Kyle and Kenny hang out with such a jerk like Eric Cartman? Well, "South Park" would not be much of a show if they didn't. But also, it is true that in grade school you don't always choose your friends. Your friends often choose you. And really, who else but Stan, Kyle and Kenny would have Eric Cartman as a friend?