How to Recognize and Begin to Face Depression

When you’re depressed, the question HOW ARE YOU is like a test. You know the answer you want to give, but you also know the answer people expect to hear which just makes you more depressed that you can’t give that answer. But you say you’re fine anyway, even though a voice inside your head is screaming HELP ME, HELP ME, I’M DROWNING IN HERE.

When you’re depressed, you wake up in the morning hoping it’s raining. There’s nothing as satisfying as a rainy day to a manic because it’s like suddenly your mindset is the norm. Rainy days are supposed to be depressing. Just ask Karen Carpenter. Sunny days suck because you know that the non-depressed are out living their lives, throwing Frisbees to their dogs in the park, and eating lunch outside.

When you’re depressed, it doesn’t matter if it’s your head saying that you’re not worth as much as other people or if it’s true, you just know that you feel that way.

When you’re depressed, a pill doesn’t make it all better; it just prevents you from wanting to crawl out of your skin every time you feel down. That doesn’t stop your friends and family from thinking otherwise, thinking you’re cured and “normal” whatever that is.

When you’re depressed, you hate happy people. Truthfully, you’re intensely jealous of them because the truly happy are almost as rare as the Dodo.

When you’re depressed, you’re blessed and cursed with the ability to see the fallacy of almost any black and white argument. Nothing is clear and the depressed always see that. Never knowing if the decisions you’re making are the right ones. And once you are aware and dealing with your depression, you get to question whether every decision you’re making is being made by real you, depressed you, or drugged you. Because the truly manic will constantly struggle with his or her self-identity given how tied up it is in self-esteem.