To Spank or Not to Spank: Effective Parenting Tips

Spanking has been dubbed lazy parenting by some, and this is because parents who use spanking as a means of discipline, fail to resolve the behavior using patience and consideration, instead parents who spank, disregard and disrespect the child's emotions by making them feel as though they have misbehaved when it's really the parented who has "mis- parented." In most instances a child never learns from being spanked.

Spanking is not an effective way of parenting it teaches children that problems can only be "resolved" through spanking, it installs fear in a child and "gives them the false perception that once they get bigger they too can spank and hit." Parents often spank their children under stress, out of anger , frustration, or when they posses very limited patience, sometimes parents spank their children because it has been an established, and accepted means of disciplining children in their family for generations; but either way spanking should be avoided.

It's important for parents to realize that most of the time children do not attempt to behave. What parents interpret as acting up can actually be signs of distress in young children. Parents must remember that children are not adults, they are not mature, and therefore often express their feelings, and themselves through whining and other characteristics, presumed unfavorable by parents. To effectively parent and discipline a parent must know the signs of distress in their children and respond to them rightfully, and respectively. Before you discipline check for the signs of distress in your child.

What are the signs of distress?

Fatigue

Overwhelmed, over stimulated

Sick

Boredom

Frustration

Stress

Attention- when not given an adequate amount of attention children will feel neglected, this cry for attention is positive, and not misbehavior.

Children need you to recognize their distress and then comfort and correct their situation. They need to be nurtured, they are looking for patience, and compassion, not spanking, hitting, or yelling.