Age Gap Relationships

What Do They See in Each Other?

By Karl Withakay, published Mar 21, 2006
Published Content: 58  Total Views: 197,903  Favorited By: 13 CPs
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Age gap relationships are become more and more common these days.  Just what do these people see in each other? This article will discuss the issue in America today.

When was the last time you saw a couple that you just assumed were father and daughter or one that you thought were son and mother?  Well you may have been mistaken.  These days, many don't see it as unusual at all to see a big age gap in a relationship and age gap relationships are getting more and more common.

It used to be that the average woman in her early 20s for example saw a man in his 30s, 40s, or even 50s as dull and unattractive.  But these days, things have changed.  Men are taking better care of themselves and some don't look as old as they are.  It's no secret that women mature faster than men.  Many women in their early 20s act as mature and responsible as most men do in their 30s.  

I know that's quite a leap but we've all seen it.  A woman in her early 20s may find it difficult to find a man in her age group that isn't still in the party stage.  She may find herself more comfortable in a relationship with an older man who is established in home and career and the fact that there may be 15 years or more of an age difference becomes less and less important to them.

It goes both ways.  There are indeed some young men who feel far more comfortable with an older woman. They have all sorts of reasons for being attracted to an older woman.  Perhaps they aren't into bar hopping every weekend or they appreciate "home time" a bit more than most women their age.  Some of them are superficial but many are very practical as well.

Take a look at the TV.  Actor and actress Tom Cruise 42 and Katie Holmes 26 have found romance in a 16 year age gap. Actress Demi Moore 41 and actor Ashton Kutcher 25 have fallen in love with a 16 year age gap as well.

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I'm 18. I'm crazy for a guy who is 33.....15 year age gap! The chemistry is brilliant and we're incredibly close. We always turn up at the same gigs and I get excited before I'm about to see him at work, never felt this way before!! But of course there are people around (friends, family, colleagues) who make it difficult and would be disgusted if I was to get with him. Struggling to get the relationship off to a start because we're a bit too embarassed to admit we like each other in that way but I would totally love to make a go of things, I'm too much of a wimp to admit I like him in that way though and it makes me so sad:[ think they can work though!

Posted on 05/24/2008 at 1:05:19 PM

 
just out of a relationship and in response he told me he really likes me and we decided that we'd take it "slow" (if this pace is slow for him i'd like to see what his definition of fast moving consists of!) and that if we feel its heading toward a relationship we'd discuss it then. I feel we've already reached there...he tantalizes me, i think about him loads...the way hes acting suggests hes as into me as i am into him, but in certain things he seems to hold back, like when he's around me in public, i think its cause he knows we are not officially in a relationship, and i think it because he's a very diff guy to bf 1 who was like a permanent rash. gah over-reaction and insecurity!!

Posted on 03/02/2008 at 1:03:30 PM

 
I have just ended a 3yr relationship with a guy who was only a year older than me to suddenly meet a wonderful guy who is 15 years my senior; he is everything previous bf was not and i am seriously falling for him! He is insatiable in the bedroom, so intelligent, when i argue wit him he actually responds instead of jst sitting there like a timid mouse, like hes afraid of me or something, as bf one did. the only problem is that i am only 20 and i feel ive spent the last few years of teenage life shackled to bf 1 and the idea was to be single for a while and re-discover my identity (as i felt i had become a extra limb to bf 1) but i think that older guy will give me space to do that...*so confused!* i told him that i wasnt ready for a relationship yet but for the past two weeks we've seen each other nearly every single day, he's made me dinner twice and i can count on one hand the number of days, in the past two weeks, i've slept in my OWN bed.. ;) i confessed to him that i was ju

Posted on 03/02/2008 at 1:03:50 PM

 
i was married for 15 years to somebody the same age as me and i thought it would be forever! how wrong he had an affair and its the best thing thats happened to me. I have now been with my boyfriend for over a year he is 67 and i am 38. what we have is fantastic - he makes me laugh, tells silly stories and is mind blowing in the bedroom!!! but beside that it has caused a lot of friction with family and friends but they now accept that we love each other and i know one day i will be without him but we are making up for that spending as much time as we can together now. LOVE HAS NO AGE BARRIER.

Posted on 01/29/2008 at 2:01:18 PM

 
im in an age gap relationship.im 21 hes 39. we`ve been together for 5months so its early,and ive discussed the issues of marriage and children briefly so he knows its very important to me.But we havent spoken in detail.Hes been in 2 relationships and has three children,so i dont know if hes ready to start all over again.for me its all new,for him hes experienced it.so im just hoping and praying that oneday he`ll be my husband and we will both argee on having a family.i love him and thats all that matters to us right now.

Posted on 11/29/2007 at 11:11:00 PM

 
I am so glad I found this article. My husband is 29 years older than me. I know, it sounds crazy. I thought it was crazy at first. When I first started having feelings towards him, I thought I was nuts. I thought it was a passing phase. But it turned out, the feelings were requited. He fell in love with me as I fell in love with him. It was a very surreal but unique and beautiful feeling, like nothing I had ever known before could ever exist. And it later turned to true love. And sure, he was divorced and has two kids from his previous marriage, but he does look and act younger than he is. He has a GREAT personality, and is very much young at heart. Not immature at all of course. But he and I clicked in a second. We really did. At first we were friends. Him and my dad are very good friends; that is how I met him in the first place (even crazier?: he is OLDER than my DAD by 4 years!!!). I babysat his kids here and there. And at first I thought I just had a "school girl crush" on him. I

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
I don't want to not maI don't want to not marry him or leave him and in a few decades regret and wonder how things could have been. So far they have been wonderful.

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
I reproached myself, telling myself I was crazy for allowing myself to start falling in love with him. But I realized that, if he were in my age group, or mine in his, nothing would be seen as wrong with our love in others' eyes. So why did it have to stay so? If our love would be allowed if we were the same age, why did it have to be any different? So what if he was 29 when I was born. What matters is we are both adults, and have the same genuine feelings of love towards each other. It's true, you do see more age gaps today. Just look at some of the celebrities, like Celine Dion or other women who married a man 20-30 years older than them. Honestly, I don't have a problem with my husband being almost 30 years older than me, except for the fact that we both know he will most likely die first. And that is hard to live with. That alone almost kept me from marrying him. But I figured; this is life, it's a one in a million chance. I need to take this beautiful risk.

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
He is amazing, the best husband anyone could ask for. And we have just had our own child, the first for me. I love my husband so much and thank God every hour of the day for crossing our paths. I know he may pass away first, but I hope I can see him again in Heaven after my time comes. I know when he goes, I will stay widowed and single forever after that. Many things don't work out in life and in this world. We have both found this in hard ways in our own experiences. But all we can do is CHERISH the time we have right now, the moments, the present. I will never regret it. I love him SO much... Others may have thought I was crazy, but I assure you, it is the best decision I have ever made in my life. Why let what other people think get in the way of your true and genuine happiness? If they were in my shoes, I bet they would understand and do the same thing.

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
I don't want to not marry him or leave him and in a few decades regret and wonder how things could have been. So far they have been wonderful. He is amazing, the best husband anyone could ask for. And we have just had our own child, the first for me. I love my husband so much and thank God every hour of the day for crossing our paths. I know he may pass away first, but I hope I can see him again in Heaven after my time comes. I know when he goes, I will stay widowed and single forever after that. Many things don't work out in life and in this world. We have both found this in hard ways in our own experiences. But all we can do is CHERISH the time we have right now, the moments, the present. I will never regret it. I love him SO much... Others may have thought I was crazy, but I assure you, it is the best decision I have ever made in my life. Why let what other people think get in the way of your true and genuine happiness? If they were in my shoes, I bet they would understand and do th

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
I reproached myself, telling myself I was crazy for allowing myself to start falling in love with him. But I realized that, if he were in my age group, or mine in his, nothing would be seen as wrong with our love in others' eyes. So why did it have to stay so? If our love would be allowed if we were the same age, why did it have to be any different? So what if he was 29 when I was born. What matters is we are both adults, and have the same genuine feelings of love towards each other. It's true, you do see more age gaps today. Just look at some of the celebrities, like Celine Dion or other women who married a man 20-30 years older than them. Honestly, I don't have a problem with my husband being almost 30 years older than me, except for the fact that we both know he will most likely die first. And that is hard to live with. That alone almost kept me from marrying him. But I figured; this is life, it's a one in a million chance. I need to take this beautiful risk. I don't want to not ma

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
I am so glad I found this article. My husband is 29 years older than me. I know, it sounds crazy. I thought it was crazy at first. When I first started having feelings towards him, I thought I was nuts. I thought it was a passing phase. But it turned out, the feelings were requited. He fell in love with me as I fell in love with him. It was a very surreal but unique and beautiful feeling, like nothing I had ever known before could ever exist. And it later turned to true love. And sure, he was divorced and has two kids from his previous marriage, but he does look and act younger than he is. He has a GREAT personality, and is very much young at heart. Not immature at all of course. But he and I clicked in a second. We really did. At first we were friends. Him and my dad are very good friends; that is how I met him in the first place (even crazier?: he is OLDER than my DAD by 4 years!!!). I babysat his kids here and there. And at first I thought I just had a "school girl crush" on him. I

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 9:11:00 PM

 
With one love to give, I am glad I can give it all to her. Every moment I have left on this earth will be spent making her happy bacause of her unselfish attitude towards life. I have never known such happiness could exist. She is 25 and I am 45. Our age gap is just all the years of love I have saved up just to give to one person.

Posted on 11/05/2007 at 11:11:00 PM

 
I am in an age gap relationship as well. I am 26 my bf is 41. We didnt actually plan on being a couple, just friends but things just kinda took off for us. I am very happy with him. I do like the article though for pointing out some of the complications that can arise. We have already had the difficult discussions about children, marriage, etc. But, I am confident that things will work out. Thanks for the open, unbiased article. =)

Posted on 11/03/2007 at 1:11:00 PM

 
I'm in age gap relationship I'm happy and it's different compared to other relationships in the past. But, all I can say is that there's a light shining in this relationship. Besides I haven't been in a serious relationship in the past 4 years. But, this relationship now I'm happy now. But I just stay prayerful.

Posted on 10/29/2007 at 8:10:00 AM

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