The Art of Butt Wiping: Hiney Hygiene

Know Your Facilities and Customs for the Ulitimate Butt Wipe

With Sheryl Crow's recent comments, hiney hygiene is a brand new topic of conversation. There is an art to the proper wiping of one's butt. The butt wiper has to be aware of local customs and traditions to truly be a butt wipe master. Leaving the facilities in working order following the ultimate wipe is a part of the art form.

In the good old United States of American, there is no shortage of personal hiney hygiene products. Toilet paper at many times of the year literally seems to grow on trees. For some reason the TP blooms most often around Halloween. New products like soothing wet wipes increase the joy of an already enjoyable experience.

Recreation Vehicle (RV) and marine toilet butt wiping: The plumbing systems in RV's and boats are not the same as the standard domestic porcelain throne. These systems are not designed for multi-ply tissues, wet wipes and other hygiene products that have monthly usage cycles. Biodegradable products only if you please and in minimal amounts per flush. For Sheryl Crow to make the comments she made indicates she has boating or camping experience.

For the ultimate butt wipe experience in an RV or boat the two stage method is a pleasure. Stage one is two to three squares of biodegradable TP lightly moistened with water. In a front to back motion, remove residual cling-on with one wipe and discard. Follow immediately with a three quarter full bowl courtesy flush. Refill to bowl to half or two thirds volume. Make a final wipe with two to three squares and flush. Any hygiene items that are not fully biodegradable should be neatly wrapped in TP and placed in the waste bin provided for these items. Always remember to wash your hands following any butt wiping activity.

Domestic low volume toilet usage: The directions for RV and boats apply to low volume toilets. It is a two-stage (two flush) process when number two is involved. An exception to this RV rule is that wet wipes may be disposed of in the toilet. Other bulky hygiene products are not recommended for low volume toilets without a recommended third flush. Remember to flush sequentially to avoid those undesired toilet backups.