Emotional Abuse is Often Undermined

Emotional abuse is based on power and control. When the abuser does not lay a hand on their victim to cause physical harm, the aspects of emotional abuse are often disregarded. Without recognition of the seriousness of this type of harm against another, it leaves the victim to stand alone.

*Tom is a 40 year old man whose marriage is ending after 15 years. He and his wife *Lisa, 37, have two children, 10 and 13 years old. Tom is an emotionally abusive person. Although he has never hurt his family physically, his abusive actions have left scars on them all. The dangers of physical abuse may lie in wrestling matches, played 'all in fun' with the children, when Tom may be able to "accidentally" hurt the children.

There are many forms of emotional abuse. Rejecting, degrading, terrorizing, isolating, corrupting, and denying emotional responsiveness are all methods of an abusers madness. Tom's tactics include rejecting, degrading, stalking, isolating, and denying emotional responsiveness.

He rejected Lisa by devaluing her thoughts and feelings. Tom has and still does refuse to acknowledge Lisa's worth. Although Lisa dedicated all the time needed to care for her family and children, Tom does not respect her as a valuable part of their children's lives. Instead, because he feels rejected now that they are divorcing, he has spread the word to all that will listen that she is not and never was a good mother. Lisa and her children, along with those who know her well, know better than that.

Tom's degrading words have hurt Lisa and the children. Tom was insulting, telling Lisa she didn't look nice. Tom calls his children and other people names. He uses the excuse that this is done 'all in fun' but those on the receiving end of being called names don't feel like they're having much fun. Tom imitates and laughs at others. When with his children, he belittles mentally challenged people and those with other disabilities.