Should Mom Stay at Home? - An Explanation of Working Moms Vs. Stay at Home Moms

Martha Graves gives a good answer: "There is no doubt that kids need moms. But they also need role models in the workplace" (Graves 1998 99). One problem now is that there are far too many single moms. That means they have to earn money to nurture their child or children. Even when there is a father around, today's cost of living is high. Saving for college education often requires a two-wage-earner family. So, there is a key problem: is there a "right" or "wrong" for mom to stay at home?

Some years ago, there was a movie called "Mr. Mom" where the husband stayed at home while the wife worked. This is rare, but it happens. Why is it rare? Because there is gender bias that continues to exist. The majority of ordinary people feel that the mom is more important in the upbringing of children, especially at an early age. Even adults think of Mom first. Did you ever watch a sports event, where the camera zooms in on an athlete? He usually says "Hi, Mom" when he sees the camera is focused on him. Even so, Graves claims we still live in a male dominated world. Look at all the press given Anika Sorenstam when she "invaded" a men's golf tournament, as if she were some weird creature being where she was neither wanted nor capable. It is a fact, of course, that men tend to earn more- even when women perform the same job or hold the same job title. Why is that? Frankly, one reason is that many employers feel uncomfortable with women. They somehow feel just as they get into an important job, they get pregnant, take maternity leave (now mandated by federal law) and may never return, or return only part-time.

There continues to be prejudice which has many people feeling that we are still living "in a world that was constructed around the ideal of the breadwinner dad and the homemaker mom" (99). Look at some of the old TV shows: "Leave it to Beaver", "Ozzie and Harriet", even Bill Cosby, and Homer Simpson are the family breadwinners while their wives stay home and cook and clean.