The Y Chromosome Theory: Why Women Are Better Than Men

For years, scientists have researched the basic differences between human males and human females. While it has been previously declared that what determines gender are the "X" and "Y" chromosomes found in male sperm, this is only partially true. As it turns out, the "Y" chromosome is, in fact, a defective "X" chromosome with one of the legs missing. At first this discovery baffled scientists, but further research has determined that this mysterious missing leg physically manifests itself on the outer body of a male, resulting in what is commonly known as a penis. It has also been determined that human intellect is stored in this part of the chromosome, resulting in the male of the species commonly using his penis (the physical manifestation of the missing part of the chromosome) to make many decisions.

Once the genetic defect was discovered, scientists were determined to find out what other effects it may have on its victims. Unfortunately, since the penis, although technically part of the male DNA, is on the outside of the body, it deteriorates at the same rate and sometimes faster than the body of the male. This discovery led to scientists quickly finding a way to keep the penis (and thus, the male brain) functioning. The result is drugs for what is being called "erectile dysfunction." Another sign of the deterioration of the external part of the chromosome is what is widely referred to as a "mid-life crisis," during which a male will frequently search out younger women (even if he already has a perfectly lovely woman) and faster, phallic-shaped cars. He may sometimes quit a steady job and then attempt one strange get-rich-quick scheme after another, or, in extreme cases, use the time to "find himself." This is all in a subconscious effort to convince himself that he is a young, virile man; the reasoning being that if he believes it, his body will cease deteriorating.