How to Survive Living with Your Mother-In-Law
May 30, 2007 by
Sometimes life gives us lemons and we have to make lemonade! This is exactly what some men and women face simply because of financial or family situations that warrant either a husband or a wife living with their mother-in-law. There are a plethora of reasons why this might happen, too.
It may be because of financial hardships or the married couple is taking care of the mother. Whatever the reason, however, this situation can not only put a strain in the married couple's relationship, but sometimes it can be a difficult problem for everyone.
I have actually been living with my wife and her mother for quite some time now; fortunately, it has been smooth-sailing except for a few situations that have arisen over time. There are many things that you can do in order to get along with your mother-in-law and to have just as strong a relationship with your spouse as you did before your mother-in-law moved in.
#1: Realize that She's Family
The number one step in getting along with your mother-in-law and preventing major arguments and disagreements is to realize that your mother-in-law is not your enemy, but quite the opposite. Once your mother-in-law moved in she became part of the family and should be seen that way. This is not to say that she has become "mother of the house," because she hasn't. But realizing that your mother-in-law is not out to get you is crucial to staying happy and having a fresh outlook on issues that arise.
#2: Communicate with your Spouse Daily!
This is also another crucial step in making sure that nothing comes between you and your spouse. One of your fears may be that your mother-in-law will intentionally try to drive a wedge between you and your spouse. However, this probably only is an irrational fear, and even though it probably won't go away completely, can be reduced. By talking to your spouse and communicating with him or her on a daily basis is not only something that you should have been doing before your mother-in-law moved in, but is something that is all the more crucial after she has moved in!
#3: Talk to your Mother-in-law
I have actually been living with my wife and her mother for quite some time now; fortunately, it has been smooth-sailing except for a few situations that have arisen over time. There are many things that you can do in order to get along with your mother-in-law and to have just as strong a relationship with your spouse as you did before your mother-in-law moved in.
#1: Realize that She's Family
The number one step in getting along with your mother-in-law and preventing major arguments and disagreements is to realize that your mother-in-law is not your enemy, but quite the opposite. Once your mother-in-law moved in she became part of the family and should be seen that way. This is not to say that she has become "mother of the house," because she hasn't. But realizing that your mother-in-law is not out to get you is crucial to staying happy and having a fresh outlook on issues that arise.
#2: Communicate with your Spouse Daily!
This is also another crucial step in making sure that nothing comes between you and your spouse. One of your fears may be that your mother-in-law will intentionally try to drive a wedge between you and your spouse. However, this probably only is an irrational fear, and even though it probably won't go away completely, can be reduced. By talking to your spouse and communicating with him or her on a daily basis is not only something that you should have been doing before your mother-in-law moved in, but is something that is all the more crucial after she has moved in!
#3: Talk to your Mother-in-law
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- Realizing that your MIL is not out to get you will make this transition easier for everyone.
- Keeping up good communication with you spouse can help reduce any anxieties you may have.
- Talking regularly with your MIL may help break down a barrier and even create a friendship.
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