How to Make Your Small Christian Group a Harm-Free Zone

My two children bickered the entire time I was cooking breakfast. As I slammed a plate stacked with pancakes down on the table, I decided we'd better pray. "Lord," I began, "bless this food. And please bring a spirit of harmony into this home." As I started to walk away from the table, I heard my then six-year-old son say, "I know what harmony means-no harm!"

Small-group members need assurance that they are in a place where no harm will be done. People in your Bible study need to know they are safe to be themselves and share things honestly with other group members. Here are some suggestions for creating a nonthreatening atmosphere in your small group Bible study.

1. Ban badmouthing. If you have group members who consistently put others down or are routinely negative and judgmental, talk with them privately about the need to build up others in the group. Make sure your own speech and actions build up rather than put down.

2. Avoid the superstar syndrome. If certain members of the group are always the ones to pray and answer Bible study questions, less outgoing members may be afraid to participate more fully. You may need to ask the extroverts in the group to tone it down a bit so that others can get a word in edgewise. Ask the quiet group members for permission to occasionally call on them to pray, read a passage of Scripture, etc. Also, find out what interests the more introverted group members and find ways to incorporate those things into your meetings. Even shy people often open up when the subject matter is something they are passionate about.

3. Keep your teaching understandable. Avoid obscure theological terms and spiritual sounding jargon. You might sound educated, but others might feel lost. The goal is clear communication, not an ego trip. You don't want to do anything that will make people in the Bible study feel stupid.

4. Pay compliments. Periodically give group members an opportunity to compliment each other or send notes of encouragement.