How to Get Over a Break-up

While there are a myriad guides on the subject of "how to break-up," there are significantly less that successfully deal with "how to get over it." Let's face it, for those of us who are doing the breaking up portion, life is a bit easier; you remain in control, and you are the one virtually unscathed by the situation; after all, it was your choice to end the relationship. Perhaps, one byproduct might be guilt; but a week later: Poof!, its gone!

Now for the fifty percent of us that were the ones broken up with, we face a whole different predicament. The feelings of despondency are endless and vary for each individual, depending on how long we were trapped in such situation. And yes, I am using the world trapped, because that's what it is. Otherwise, how else can you explain this feeling of being completely dependent on someone and then when free of them, you basically become a helpless little animal. This is what happens to dolphins who are held in captivity all their lives, and then freed into the ocean. They cannot survive! They are the ones being killed in the name of tuna. Do not let your destiny end up the same.

I am telling you there is some hope.

The good news is also the bad news: You're still alive. I like to think that the end of a really wonderful relationship symbolizes you're own death. If you die, then you're ex will come running back to you and feel this incredible amount of guilt and sadness, and during your funeral eulogy remark on what an amazing person you were, and end the lament with, "God, Why did thou take her from me? I still love thee so!" Despite the whole "being dead thing," I always imagined that hearing my ex say that phrase (old English and all) would make my life worth it.

So, you can imagine my surprise when I woke up every morning following the break-up shocked that I actually woke up. Not only that, but I rarely ever got sick, was never bed-ridden, like some friends become post break-up. In fact, I was healthier than I had ever been, exercising daily. I even lost some weight. You can imagine how pissed I was.