Tips for Parents Preparing for Their Child's Surgery

How to Survive the Stress

Preparing for Your Child's Surgery: Shall We Dance?

I am gathering a wealth of experience in how to "do" the pre-surgical worry dance. My son Gerard's two previous surgeries were lightning fast decisions that left me shouting, "Wait, wait, I've still got to pack the car..." or otherwise. 

This experience has been quite a different one in terms of the waiting period. My son's surgery date for the fontan, a complicated heart surgery, was scheduled 2 and 1/2 months ago. That is a LONG time to wait for anything. So in the true spirit of journalism I took this question out to a variety of people "How do you survive mounting anxiety like this and still manage to not completely lose it?" 

A number of families who I correspond with on the pdheart mailing list said "drugs." Yes, drugs, the legal kind that is. It actually surprised me the sheer number of responses I got on various anti-depressants and their efficacy, whether Xanax was okay to take short term or would you really get addicted. Some people only needed a sleeping pill, others needed anti-anxieties like Buspar, others hoarded a bottle of valium and used it only during hospital stays. One woman wrote that the only thing her husband takes is a drug called "D Nial" (okay bad joke I know). All he needs is a dose of reality to fix that up.
Many wrote that such things were positive "life-savers" while still others said they couldn't feel a difference one way or the other. All were in agreement, however, that should you choose to try any number of different prescription products for anxiety, that you do so under a doctor's, and preferably a psychiatrist's care.