The Lives of Men and Women with HIV by Robert Klitzman, MD

Chapter 1: Rollercoasters

This chapter speaks most of the process of "realization"-the difference between knowing and then actually accepting that you are infected.

I read this chapter and hearing the stories really hit home. I began to wonder if I should be screened, again, and with that came the question of whether or not it really is better to know. Of course, you owe it to anyone you may come in contact with, and as a responsible member of society, to find out and take precautions so as not to spread the disease any further, should you be infected. However, it's the question of how do you live your life to the fullest, while not being impaired by your potential impending death. This was the question Yvette Bing brought up.

Further, it's also devastating to realize you must now throw out all your old dreams and revise them to ones appropriate for your "new life", in consideration of your illness. Personally, this made me think a lot. I don't now if I could handle finally pursuing my dreams as I am now, only to find out tomorrow that it may be in vain, because I may never get there.

Chapter 2: Taboos

This chapter discusses the fact that HIV infected individuals not only have to deal with their potential impending loss of their own life, but the loss of their identity as they were viewed by others. Upon diagnosis, they become stigmatized and ostracized in many ways and by many different social groups.

This chapter really touched me with the explanations of how different individuals were stigmatized. The fact that a family member would ostracize you by forcing you to use paper plates and utensils when the rest of the table is set with dinner and flatware, is so lacking compassion. This was in the case of Lorraina Ortiz. It was so saddening to hear that your own flesh and blood could outcast you so blatantly. Also surprising was an experience that Wilma spoke of. This was the case in which the healthcare worker used three pairs of gloves while dealing with her.