ESPN's Real Top 10: Moments that Define College Football (in Their Mind)

The management at ESPN does not want you to see this list. In their mind, nothing is wrong with it. After all, it represents ESPN's true feelings. But thankfully, there are content editors out there with good taste. After days of pleading with ESPN's suits, the editors won out. How did they convince the big wigs that their original list was a bad idea? Free Yankees-Red Sox tickets.

What follows is ESPN's original list of "Top 10 Moments that Define College Football."

10. August 30, 2005: Charlie Weis eats his first hot dog as Notre Dame's head coach.. He then eats #'s 2-26 in the next 4 minutes. When he finally can open his mouth without spilling precious pig innards, he burps, "KOBAYASHI!!!!"

9. September 9, 1949: Joe Theismann is born.

9b. September 10, 1949: The earplug is invented.

8. October 15, 2005: Dewey Defeats Truman II. Actually, it was more like Notre Dame Defeats USC. One problem- they didn't. Yet, for some crazy reason, everyone seems to forget that little fact. Charlie Weis was canonized the following day. Brady Quinn was given the Heisman. Jeff Samardzija was renamed "Fred Biletnikoff." Meanwhile every newspaper and media outlet searched to find a number better than "1," because any team that could play USC so close deserved to be rewarded.

7. November 9, 1946 and November 19, 1966: Notre Dame's cowardice results in two of the "greatest" wastes of time ever. Both Army (1946) and Michigan State (1966) could have accomplished as much by not even showing up. As for Notre Dame, it became apparent that they didn't mind "kissing their sister." Hey, have you ever seen those St. Mary's girls?

6. October 25, 1924: The Four Horsemen do something. Anything.