The Effects An Undiagnosed Mental Illness Could Have on Your Family

When mental illness goes undiagnosed for years, sometimes generations, it can leave an entire family in shambles. Abuse, neglect and broken homes are often the product of psychiatric disorders that have been ignored, denied or misunderstood. The entire family gets swept up in the whirlwind that can be caused by mania, psychosis and depression. It's like there is an elephant in the living room that everyone pretends not to notice.

The house is a disaster. There are piles of paper on every table. The faucet runs a steady stream of water onto a pile of unwashed dishes. Kids streak through the house, screeching and laughing in loud and frenzied voices. One child swings a plastic sword, giving the other a bloody nose. Mom stands in the kitchen helpless to stop madness that devastates any semblance of routine and stability. Either she throws up her hands in frustration or moves herself into a position of control. Either way, she knows that it will be an arduous task. Mom is exhausted from cleaning up after the elephant in the living room all the time. Undiagnosed mental illness in children touches every member of the family. An ill-fated sibling often receives the brunt of the aggressive behavior. Sibling rivalry escalates into a full-blown sibling state of war. Brothers and sisters often feel ignored due to the parent's focus on the affected child. Either the well child begins to mimic the behaviors of the affected child or they become the "peacemaker" and strive for perfectionism. One parent may start to blame the other for the child's conduct, continually accusing them of being too lenient or too strict. If the problem cannot be pinned on some contradictory parenting style, then it is often blamed on a faulty gene pool. One parent screaming at the other, "Your family is full of wackos! Look at your Aunt Margie, she's a nut!" Not knowing what is causing a child to behave, in such a confusing, dangerous or unusual manner can turn even the most Cleaver-ish family on one another. Everyone is looking for someone to blame.