Grammatical Period Sometimes it Feels like an Exclamation Point

What is a period? This question made me ponder often as a young girl. I mean, I 'know' what one is. But really, why do we get the honor of having this special monthly treat? As an adult, I have concluded that a period is simply that of a period of time in which a woman's body has to endure a bodily change for the length of one week - sometimes, and more times than not, including pain that only Midol or your preferred alcoholic beverage of choice can relieve.

It might be all the alcohol speaking here, but also during a period, which is when I find I am the most enlightened on this subject, you go through a series of events very similar to that of our English punctuation system. For example, yesterday my period felt like a Question Mark. This morning, it felt like that which would be found on the end of any normal sentence. And now, well, it feels like an exclamation mark.

Last night I drank a margarita to ease my worries affiliated with my Question Mark stylized period. This morning I awoke to realize my Period Pal from out of town came to visit. I quickly chased a Midol with a cup of soy milk to alleviate any unwanted Exclamation Points. Although, I was feeling perfectly normal with my end of the sentence normalcy correlated with generic punctuation. But then, during the afternoon hour, I got side tracked by my normal day and completely forgot that I needed to be taking precaution towards any unwanted Exclamation Points. See, normal Periods can be tricky. They set you up for disaster. You feel fine and dandy with your good 'ole Period Pal. He has no reason to remind you that his friend is coming in from out of town, too - Exclamation Point. Until, of course, it is too late.

So, that leads me to my current predicament. Tonight, if my Exclamation Point does not subside, I will probably sit in my bath tub and enjoy a nice hot steamy bubble bath - but not until after I chase another murderous Midol with another margarita. Shoot, I may just make it strait up Cointrau with a salt rimmed shot glass. This all depends on how hastily Exclamation Point wants to go back home.