Using Action to Replace Adverbs in Fiction Writing

In elementary school, you learned about adverbs. These words, usually ending in 'ly,' are used to modify verbs. Your teacher may have enjoyed reading how Spot the dog quickly and playfully chased the ball, but they have limited space in adult fiction writing.

Adverbs Modify Verbs - But Why?

Adverbs modify your verbs because your verbs are weak.

A lack of an expansive vocabulary can keep a fiction writer using adverbs. Verbs show the action in your story, and if your verbs are boring or ordinary, your action might be as well.

Using adverbs in fiction writing is a simple way to paint a picture for your audience. However, it does not always paint an exciting picture. Learning to use action to replace adverbs in fiction writing will spice up your story and engage the reader more.

How to Use Action to Replace Adverbs

It is possible to add an adverb to any action in your fiction writing. It will describe the action and create a different spin on it. However, you can create the same spin, or tone, with active verbs.

Example: The man ran quickly.

In this example, you can see that the man is running. The adverb tells you that he is running quickly as opposed to slowly.

Deleting the adverb and modifying the verb will bring more action to your writing.

Corrected Example: The man sprinted.

These simple examples form pictures in your mind. In the first, you have a man running fast. In the second, the action verb 'sprinted' tells you that the man is running as fast as he can. It imparts more information than the adverb.

Example: The woman walked sexily across the floor.

First of all, sexily just sounds awful. Secondly, it tells the reader how the woman walked, but does nothing to engage them.

Replacing the adverb with some definite action satisfies the fiction writer's need to show and not tell.

Corrected Example: The woman sashayed across the floor, hips swaying like a pendulum, her breasts thrust against the fabric of her silk blouse.

Which one gives you a better picture of what is really happening? The first one tells you the woman is sexy, the second one puts you in the scene, watching the woman walk by with all the other panting men in the room.